Loving you
by Star-chan
Summary: Revised. Someone wants to make Goku's life miserable and she seems to be succeeding... Will Goku ever be happy? KonzenGoku...


**Loving you **

by Star-chan

Disclaimer: Saiyuki belongs to Kazuya Minekura-sensei... and i can only dream of it... 

Author's Note: Hello!!! Nya~ the revival of 'Loving you'!! I have kind of revised back this chapter. Hope that it has changed for the better, and that you all reading this will enjoy it! XD

------------------------------------------

He looked at his owner's face sadly, wondering what had happened to the kind soul his owner had used to be… wondering what had changed his master and why it had happened. All those questions kept repeating itself in his head... why? He had always known that he was a heretic, others would sometime call him a taboo for having gold eyes. But what was the differences? He was still a living being, who wanted love and attention. 

Yet, none of his previous owner had treated him well. Even if they did, slowly they would change and hate him, abuse him, use him and if he refused… they would threaten him to do what they wanted. Then, he himself would be helpless, he alone would regret the whole ordeal. Throughout the whole story, he could only be a witness. And being one was certainly painful. 

He had wanted to live with him forever... just like he wanted to with the rest. Wanted to stay in that exact time and simply hope that it would last forever. Yet, deep inside him, there was always that small voice that would pop out and remind him of the reality. The truth was that he was destined to be alone. That he was never to have any sort of relationship with any living creature at all. But, was it really true that fate and destiny could never be changed? No, he didn't want that. He was tired of it. Tired of the simple meaning of "alone". On the other hand, he didn't want them to die... it was simply meaningless.

That's why he had wanted to run away before he hurt any of them. Mainly because he knew that they would change, no matter what happened... they would change. They would suddenly pull off their masks and become hideous beasts. And he knew that he, himself would change too, and he would kill them... It wasn't exactly him... but their blood remained on his hands, reminding him everytime he forgot. Yet, he couldn't bring himself to do so….. he didn't have enough courage to run away. He couldn't help but hope that somehow, they wouldn't change and that the both of them could live a happy life..… happily ever after, just like in all those books he had read.  

It had taken a bit longer this time, but his master was changing, and he knew it. It had been two weeks already, he was wandering in the desert and then Kira came and offered him help. Since then, they had been living together. He helped his new master with the daily chores everyday and life went on. Kira was slowly morphing into the monster he feared. If he didn't leave now, Kira would completely lose his old self. 

But, he had taken too long to think. By the time he wanted to step out the door, Kira returned. 

"Where are you going?" Kira asked, his voice almost seemed normal, unlike the one it had changed into the past two weeks. The one that had the tint of malice to it, that would make one tremble when he spoke.

He didn't know what to say. Yesterday, his plan was to quietly disappear without giving an explaination. Today, unconciously, he had wrote a short note, and that note was currently in his trembling hands. He didn't know what else to do other than to give him the letter. Words couldn't find its way out of him.

Kira harshly pulled the letter out of his hands and quickly glanced through it.

"You're leaving me?" Kira looked at him disgustingly, "Hah, and you think its so easy to leave me... you planned to go without telling me, did you?" Kira slowly walked closer to him, and the boy could only back himself into the small hut again. 

"Kira... please stop this... please." He softly pleaded. But, knowing that the man had changed so drastically, it was just a futile effort. It wasn't possible to escape now and he could only crawl into that small shell of protection. 

_Don't come closer... please?_

          Kira advanced nearer, leaving the boy to only two options... the first one was to simply surrender. And staying meant he had to watch Kira die... slowly and painfully... but, he wondered to himself. Was the second option better? Was leaving it all a mystery a better way for himself? He couldn't think of a better way out... 

          In the blink of an eye, Kira was already in front of him. He could only give out muffled pleas as Kira forced his tongue into the boy's mouth. His aimless beating on the man's chest was useless, Kira didn't even look as though he felt it. As the boy looked at Kira's face, he could only see the devil's one there... There was really no use struggling... was there?

_Is fate really that cruel?_

          He could do nothing... Kira slowly pushed up his shirt, and the boy could do naught but shut his eyes tightly. Wishing that this never happened... wishing that he could turn back time... he was slowly slipping... slipping into the world of oblivation... where he could feel no sorrow...

_Fate... IS cruel..._

          The painful transformation began... his ears grew longer until it formed small slits. His hair too, grew until it reached his waist... fingernails morphed longer and sharper like the ones carnivores used to tear apart their victims. He had truly disappeared...

Kira could only stare in fear of the new creature before him. Regreting now was no use... Slowly, his eyes flickered back in recognition of the boy. But, the boy was gone... the creature now could no longer recognize anything. It only wanted to quench it's thirst for blood. 

Kira knew that there was nothing to be done and just stood there, with his calm and wise posture. He knew when death was near, and he accepted it. The creature then played his part as death well enough, giving Kira eternal sleep in a moment's time.

--------------------------------------------

Alone... Yes, he was alone again. But now, was alone such a bad thing? Or was it even a blessing? He continued walking, he just wanted to get away from that dreaded house. 

_What happened?_

          He continued walking along that small path that lead him to a desert. Yes, he was walking aimlessly... Clueless of what to do. What was he supposed to do actually?

_Yes... What had happened?_

          Slowly, he was being drained of his energy. He had no water... no food. And thus, he fainted.

---------------------------------------------

When he woke up, he could only see swirls of blue. The world looked strangely turned around. And then, he felt the surface of what had been pulling his legs and realised that he was being carried upside down. He also started to remember where he originally was and began struggling.

"Let me down!" he shouted out while banging his puny fists against the man's back. "Faster, let me go! Where are you bringing me to?"      

"Ceh, why should i even listen to you! You little-monkey!" came the man's reply. He was smirking too, a cigarette hung down the side of his mouth.

"Let me go!!!" the boy started shrieking loudly. "Let me... let me go!" But, no reply came. The man simply ignored him. Then, after a few minutes of loud shrieking, he was then thrown on the floor harshly. 

"There, take him." The boy heard the man talking again. But, this time he wasn't talking to him. Before he could say anything, another guard dragged and pushed him along the corridors into a big hall. In the middle of the room was a huge throne with a black-haired lady occupying it. On her two sides stood two men. One of them had grey hair, and gave out a humble look. Whereas the other man was completely different... He was clad up in a sleeveless lavender suit and had long blonde hair. His features were of those that would be called, beautiful, however odd it was for a man.

The boy's attention was completely focused on the blond and slowly, he inched upon the man. His hands slowly wrapped itself around a small strand of the blond's hair. 

"Your hair... it- it reminds me of the sun..." The boy muttered in awe. And with a small tug, the strands he was holding fell down.

          Konzen's short-temper was immediatly triggered. He started chasing the boy around the hall, throwing fans at the boy. But, his aiming seemed to be a little off. The little tyke managed to dodge all his attacks, until he finally gave up and crumpled onto the floor.

"I'm... sorry..." the boy weakly said, and then, he slowly closed his eyes and fell into the world of dreams. 

_Your hair... it reminds me of the sun..._

_--_End of chapter one_—_

Author's Note: Nya~ was it okay?? Please leave this poor author a review or send your comments to star_foreva88@hotmail.com. I'm really sorry for having delayed Tainted Memories for so long, but... i'm still stuck... Gomen nasaii!!!!!

Thanks for reading his humble fic of mine! XD


End file.
